2015 Recap

Quit my job AGAIN.

I left my own construction company. Not because it makes no money. Last year I only did 1 project and the money I made was more than my annual income as an engineer. The project lasted for 2 months at the beginning of the year. After that I hadn't take on anymore job. So I was being pretty useless for the rest of the year. And I wasn't being lazy either.

To think back at that time, I think I was depressed.

Ha. Ha.

When was I wasn't?

Ever?

I'm going to be honest (I just realized that I had nothing to lose by being honest). Starting this very moment, everything you are about to read is my essence. This is me baring my heart and soul to you. So please, be kind.

I hated my job. It wasn't honest. Money comes pouring in but I felt like I didn't earned it. I'm probably the weird one. It's not like I grew up with money. My father was a teacher and my mother a housewife. And with 4 other siblings, I think we were not that well off.

Who doesn't like money? I like money. I like spending it. Better than drugs, better that the finest chocolate. But it feel empty when you are spending money you feel you did not earned. I miss the feeling of gratitude.

Again, I'm probably just weird. Or lost.

You have no idea what a disappointment I became to my family. I can't tell how many times my mother told me that her life must have been cursed because I went from earning six figures a year to being useless.

I want to be happy. From now on, I only want to do things that make me happy. I asked her if she ever thought about suicide. She said no. What a weird thing to say, she added. Because I had, I said. Every day for the past 7 years. Now that I'm back in my mother's house, that thought never once crossed my mind.

By the way, I sold my my house and get rid of the mortgage. What a liberating feeling. With the little money I made from selling the house, I bought a small plot of land (quarter acre) and built a 10 ft x 12 ft tiny house.




It's not yet finished because I ran out of money. I did not have any saving when I ditch the company. So now I have to work to earn money. I will start selling used clothing next week at the flea market.

This time the money will taste sweet. And grateful.

2015

Urmm... did 2015 just pass by?

Lol.

I know.

I'm gonna make it up to you.

Soon.

Very soon.

I hope.

Let's hope so.

Bye for now.

A fortune teller

Earlier this year, I met a fortune teller. He said our meeting was destiny. When he first introduce himself and tell me that he's there to read my fortune, I laughed. Not because I'm mocking him but because I never met a fortune teller before except the online tarot reader which I'm fully aware a computer. It was lunchtime so I thought why not let the poor guy entertain me and let me amuse myself.

So I started by asking "When will I die? I'm going to die before 40, aren't I?". He took one long look at my face and said on a serious tone "No, you're going to die at the age of 88". And just like that I stopped laughing.

Next, he asked me to write down my name, and i did. Then he said, "I'm a holy man, and I'm gonna make you believe in my power". And what happened next was he listed down all the thing about me by making some calculation from my name and he happened to be right about all of it. Bear in mind, until that moment I only provide him my full name and I didn't even bother to remember his.

This is what his list looked like;-
1. My birthday ( He is probably a computer hacker. Thus, he know my birthday and made a research about me before approaching me. But I never put my real birthday online. I even lied about my birthday on facebook. It shows who your true friends are.)
2. My mother's name (Again, he's a computer hacker)
3. My brothers and sister (Super genius hacker)
4. My favorite flower (Duh, I'm a statistic, cause I like rose)
5. My most challenging year (It's when my father passed away. He probably read my blog. I wonder if I ever wrote about that though)
6. My car plate no (He saw me earlier getting out from my car)
7. My savings in the bank (Again, he's a creepy computer hacker)
8. My money in my purse (This is hard to explain because I never know how much money I would have in my purse left. Even at this very moment, I never cared how much money left in my wallet. So I told him that I have no idea how much money I have right now. Then he asked me to count right there, in front of him. And the amount was the exact amount as he'd written down, $392.00. How creepy is that?)
9. My life problem at the moment (This was also tricky. I told him that I don't know what my life problem is. I have a lot so I don't know that to say. He said, "Just choose something". After giving a lot of thoughts I finally said "I'm not satisfied". And then he revealed what he wrote, just 2 words "NOT SATISFIDE". And yes, his spelling was wrong.)

That's just the tip of the iceberg. Of course, there were a few more questions. And of course he knew what my favorite colour, my favorite number, all the normal horoscope stuff. A warning to those who loves to have their fortune told, it's only fun until it get serious. Imagine if you have a secret so dark that you keep it locked so deep in your memory and never once you reminisce, only to have it discussed so openly in front of your face.

I've always considered myself to be a free person. Not chained by a past or secret. Or that's what I thought until I met the fortune teller from hell. He can read the past and future like a book, but apparently not my feelings. NO, I don't want to talk about the most shameful thing ever happened to me. And I don't care how can I get over it. I just don't want to know anything about it, ever. It was the longest one sided torturous conversation I ever had.

I don't even care the future prediction he done for me. All the time I wish for it to be over. And after a lengthy amount of time it was finally over. But not without being reminded of my problem at the end. He said, he'll pray for me to heal. And I paid $150 for his service. Before leaving he said that our path will cross again in the future.

Now, that is one fortune teller that I do not wish to cross path again.

Few days after meeting him, I got the feeling that he really did pray for me. Cause that night, for the first time ever, my mind was clear. And I slept like I've never slept before.

So, fancy a fortune reading? Think again.