This is Miau. He died on December 4th, 2012.
When my father passed away 5 years ago, i said to my self, never again i will cry and let my heart hurts like that. Soon after that, my grandmother followed my father steps. And i didn't cried once. I learned that the recipe for not to be hurt again is never begin to care. So, as time goes by, i became meaner. And i thought by now, i had it all under my palms. That nothing can break me.
The joke was on me.
My cat is my kryptonite.
Who would have thought that the silly creature would hold a dear effect on man?
I was there with him when he drew his last breath. I held him in my arms, pleading him to come back. It took me a while to keep it together. I got up, grab a shovel and i finally buried him in my backyard. There was no sweet simple ceremony or memorial for him. I barely breathe when i buried him. Once finished, i took a shower, jump in to my pj, drew all the curtains closed and then i lay still in bed. I tried to sleep hoping to wake up and find that all was but a dream. But in the end, i could not get any sleep for 3 days, and everything became very real that it cannot be altered.
Right now, i'm still in the grieving phase. I feel like i still haven't done crying. Every time i saw his usual lounging spot i will break down to tears. I know that it'll get easier over time. Just like how i've recovered from my father's death, i know that i'll get through this one as well.
Rest in peace, Miau.
